约书亚Joshua Chieng: May 2014

“Men, let’s be real men.”

The ad proceeded to promote a new testosterone pill. If consumed, this pill promised to boost manliness—increased sex drive, muscles and masculinity.

The most frightening thing about this ad is that it speaks some truth—in the sense that our society has managed to reduce manhood to sex drive and muscles.

I don’t know about you, but that is so ridiculously far from my definition of masculinity. The truth is, women are looking for so much more in a man than strong muscles and libido. Far more than cars, athletic ability and all the other meaningless things our society uses to define manhood, there are some things that actually define the measure of a man.

So men, go ahead and ditch the weights, the hot rods and the testosterone pills, because if you’re really trying to catch a fine woman here’s what she’s looking for:

Honesty

More than any other trait, women are looking for a man who is open and honest. The thing about honesty is that it’s a sign of security. What you see is what you get, and there is absolutely nothing to hide.

Men, it’s time to stop pretending and start being real—real with your strengths, your weaknesses, your struggles. Real with your hopes, your dreams and your fears. Real with who you actually are; not who you want to be. A man who has nothing to hide becomes the safe place in which a woman can hide her heart. Now that’s straight-up manly.

Purity

We live in a society that has fooled us into thinking that women have no control over their emotions and men have no control over their eyes. I’m a firm believer that this is a lie straight from the pit of hell. It sickens me to interact with women who expect their men to fall prey to lust, cheating and adultery, as if that’s just part of being a man.

There is no doubt that we live in a world full of sexual temptation and struggles, but it is also true that we serve a God who gives us victory over our entire being—our minds, hearts and bodies. True masculinity comes when a man has enough honor and respect for the woman in his life to say no to temptations. True masculinity comes from a man who knows his weaknesses, but sets himself up to succeed. True masculinity is found in a man who says no to the expectations of this world and lives for a higher calling.

Strength

There is nothing better than a man who exudes strength. Not the muscle-rippling kind of strength, but strength of mind, heart and spirit. A strength that comes from a man who knows what he believes and stands firm for what’s right. A strength in recognizing right from wrong and confessing when he has given into the latter. A strength that is confident enough to do right, choose right and be right.

In this day of compromise, women are looking for a man who is strong enough to stand his ground and hold on to his values, his beliefs and, most importantly, his God.

Compassion

You can always recognize a real man by taking a look at his heart. Does his heart move for the things that move God’s heart? Is he broken by the pain in his life? Is he moved by the sins he’s working to overcome? Is he affected when things are not as they should be in life, in situations, in relationships?

A real man is one who allows his heart to be moved and then allows his actions to follow his heart. A man who strives for healing, restoration and resolution. A man who strives to right the wrongs around him—and the wrongs within him. Women are looking for men of compassion, tenderness and love because therein we will always find the heart of Jesus.

Humility

What raises a man up more than any other earthly thing is his ability to humble himself. A real man doesn’t need to talk up who he is, because his life does that for him. He can put away the talk, because a man of humility is focused so much more on his walk. He is quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry because he has put away his “rights” for the right to be selfless, loving and full of grace.

The greatest example of humility is found in the manliest man: Jesus. A man who laid down his rights and made Himself nothing in order to be an example of undying love and affection to the bride who won His heart. Real men seek to do the same.

This is exactly the kind of man who I allowed to win my heart. While I can safely say that he’s nowhere near perfect, he is a man who strives to uphold honesty, purity, strength, compassion and humility in his life and in our marriage.

Women, it’s time to expect more from men, and then, to wait patiently until you see these qualities at work in his life. Don’t you dare settle for less.

Men, it’s time to say no to the lies that are being poured into your brains. You are worth far more than that. Your masculinity is defined by so much more than you think—and that is what is truly attractive in our eyes.

May God continue to work in the lives of our men, that by His grace they would strive to carry the traits that reflect nothing less than the heart of Jesus.

Now that, my friends, is what I call a manly man.

"Women are looking for so much more in a man than strong muscles and libido."

"Women are looking for men of compassion, tenderness and love because therein we will always find the heart of Jesus."

Read more at http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/what-women-want-godly-man#TPvtqWxYUKzbMuA5.99

我渴望为上帝有个美好的成就。特别想看到在我的大学在五年后有1500位基督徒。我已做好准备面对前方各种未知的挑战。这路程才开始，挑战就来了。上帝让我看到我紧紧抓住的东西。而且有是我最爱的。上帝要我完全的放下，并交托给与他。这好难哦！原因很简单，就是因为怕失去他所以不肯放手。我身为一位基督徒，我知道需要放下，也很想放下，但是就是缺乏一股力量。今天做了决定，要放下了，因为我不想让这事影响我被上帝更大的使用。人生只有一次机会，我要好好及谨慎的面对每一个难关，及作正确的决定。我想相信我可以改变历史。单单为上帝而活！

上帝，把这一切交给你了。因为你比我还要在乎**。求你帮助我有对你有更多的热忱。使用我来改变历史。我在这里，请差遣我！

男人最难的就是放手，以为会失去一切。但在上帝里，放手不是失去一切，而是拥有一切，并且更好的。

约书亚Joshua Chieng

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Encounter with God

Excellence is not a skill. It is an attitude

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

What Women Want in a Godly Man

Honesty

Purity

Strength

Compassion

Humility

放下.....说得容易，作起来没那么容易。